la la la.
Once again, I'm too lazy to find a picture. My bad.

Yes, I am too lazy to do my own maintenance on my car. It has four wheels; it is of no use to me.

notes from the service.
Y'know when you have a sinking feeling that something's going to take you all day? Listen to that feeling.

Removing the front sparkplug from the SVS is something that you will tell your grandchildren about. One day, when you're old and gray, you'll be sitting in a rocking chair, wrapped in a blanket, while little children gather at your feet. The brave children will beg you to tell the story one more time, please, great-grandpa/ma, just one more time, about the Front Sparkplug, while the younger ones squeal and turn away, pressing their little hands against their ears.

If you think that you're done with the tank up, and put the tank back down, and fasten all the bolts, and put the seats back on, and torque everything down again, and actually manage to not crossthread the seat bolts for the first time in forever....then, the very last thing that you'll need to do in your service will require the tank to be back up. Naturally, you will say "screw that" and delude yourself that you'll come back to it tomorrow.

When your manual is for the naked model of your bike, and you have the faired model and are too lazy to buy the damn supplement for the faired model already, and the manual says to remove the lower radiator mounting bolt and then pivot the radiator up, don't be a freaking dumbass. Check to see if, y'know, the radiator is connected via grommets to your fairing instead of removing all of the mounting bolts for the entire radiator and then wondering why the damn thing still won't move. Especially don't do this because you did the same stupid thing during your last service. Might as well write "does not learn from past mistakes" on your forehead. At least you finally made a note of it in the manual this time, doofus.

Did I mention the front sparkplug? Don't ever say I didn't warn you. I have the smallest hands ever, and it's bloody impossible. I pity you larger people.

The manual says that the SV takes 2.5 US quarts of oil after draining the oil and replacing the filter. It lies. It's 3 full quarts. If you start your bike after putting 2.5 quarts in, it will make a Very Bad Noise that you will rememeber for the rest of your days as That Noise My Bike Makes When There's No Oil In It.

Stop being in denial. Your radiator hose leaks at the upper hose clamp. You had almost no coolant left in the reserve reservoir. "I'll just carry this screwdriver around and make sure to tighten the clamp sometimes" is a really ghetto way to "solve" this problem. Find the damn leak already, and fix it. Sheesh.

You know how, in every mechanics book you read, they tell you to get a little chair, or a stool, or something? You know why they say that? They say that because you are going to feel like death after spending three hours crouching down and kneeling on concrete and bending over while spelunking for spark plugs and replacing radiator mounting bolts and changing oil filters and checking cable play and adjusting your drive chain and all that good stuff. You are going to turn into a whiny poopoohead and make your boyfriend give you backrubs and hugs and say nice things to you even after you get all pissy and kick the recycling bin that he very nicely brought over for you to sit on. Seriously. That's not attractive. Go get a little stool, already. Maybe one of the nice padded ones with wheels and a little tray for tools.

zoom.
Tomorrow is Tony's birthday. Yay! Tony has invited us over to his house tomorrow afternoon to watch the first World Superbike races of the season. I know nothing about motorcycle racing at all, and am a little nervous, because everyone is going to laugh at me and point their fingers and call me names when I don't know what's going on. Coworker Ceej says there's nothing to know; that it's just some guys going around a circle very fast. I think that, even after The Front Sparkplug Horror, I can emotionally handle that.

In an attempt to be less dumb, I just went to look up tomorrow's Superbike schedule, and was immediately puked onto a website in a language that I don't know. Hrm. I guess there's also some racing at Daytona tomorrow, but as I am ignorant, I have yet to figure out the difference between World Superbike and AMA Superbike. Now I'm trying to find who's racing for Suzuki, since apparently Suzuki is the home team because we all own Suzukis. Personally, I'm tempted to just root for whoever's cutest, but that's a very girlie thing to say and I promise to be very technical and rational from now on.